A Day In The Life Of Vegeta
by trunksgirl4life
Summary: Welcome to A Day in the Life of Vegeta! What happens when yamcha becomes a lawyer? And bulma and vegeta get a divorce? Find out in this hallarious fic! Please buckel you seat belts and keep arms and legs inside the ride at all times thank you...


Disclaimer: I don't own DBZ never did never will

Disclaimer: I don't own DBZ never did never will! But I wish I owned trunks… Ooops! Did I just say that aloud???? So don't sue me all you'll get is a pencil and 5 bucks! Enjoy the fic! 

*********************************

A Day in the Life of Vegeta

"If you wanna stay here, then you better start to make a living! I don't care if you have the obsession of training to kill Kakarotto, get a job!" Bulma started to scream down Vegeta's throat as he walked into the kitchen of Capsule Corp after his daily workout. The Prince rolled his eyes and munched on a cinnamon roll to keep from having to talk. He thought about why he actually had a kid with her...   
  
After swallowing the rest of the roll, Vegeta spoke up. "Buruma-san, we're the richest people on this whole damned planet! Why should I need to get a job? It's not like we're gonna starve soon! Such a baka, Buruma-san." He chuckled softly to himself. Bulma was always a funny woman, beyond that of human insanity. She turned around, pausing for drama.   
  
"Ahem...WE--are the richest people? Ha ha ha...Well, how about if you and I are not "we", hmm? Then what? Yeah." Buruma got that funny look on her face again. Even a Super Saiya-jin can break down at one point. Just gotta find their weakness. This was one... "Okay, I want a divorce! And, um...You can have custody rights to Trunks! I'll keep the rest of the stuff, kay?"   
  
Vegeta nearly spat out his orange juice. "NANI?! Are you crazy, woman??? You can't do that to me, nobody's proven that we really were married anyway! Ask any DBZ whiz, he/she'll tell ya that!" The Prince spazzed out for awhile, while the crazed Bulma went to call her lawyer. And whuddya know, the lawyer's name was *drumroll* YAMCHA! 

Hee hee hee...*A/NSarah really needs sleep, yep!*  
  
Vegeta screamed one of those Battle screams and sighed. And then sighed some more. Cause he couldn't use the phone, Bulma was using it. He sighed a bit more, then screamed again. "Buuuullllllmmmmmaaaaaaa!! Gimme the phoooooonnneeee! I gotta call my lawyer too!" She looked over at him annoyed.   
  
"Maybe I don't want you to have a lawyer, ha ha ha!" The weird look on her face was still there. Vegeta sighed a little more, but then decided that sighing was too dull for the Prince of Saiya-jins. He knew that his wife wouldn't give up the phone. Vegeta stood up and walked down the hall to Trunks' room. He knocked on the door.   
  
"Can't come in without the password, bub!" a voice called from behind the door.   
  
Vegeta growled, "It's your father, Vegeta the almighty, ruler of all Saiya-jins, person who bows to no one, not even to himself!"   
  
"Really? Not even yourself?"  
  
"Really!"  
  
"Well, what if yourself decides that he doesn't like that and tries to kill you?"  
  
"I'd kill HIM first! Now open up!"   
  
"Waaaiit, I'm not finished! What if he's stronger? Then what???"  
  
"That wouldn't happen, cause he's the same as me! Graaah, open up!!!" Vegeta pounded his fist on the door in anger.   
  
"Huh. You'd be able to kill him first...Weird. I'd think that he'd be stronger, since he IS yourself. Maybe he's your ego, or your inner self that was suppressed as a child or..." The list went on from behind the door. Vegeta was fed up. He had no time for this.   
  
"LET ME IN!" The door swung open finally. Vegeta smirked and stepped in. He had won the battle against his own son. "Yesssss..."  
  
"Trunks, come with me. Your mother wants a divorce and doesn't want you anymore. See? This is what humans are. They are cruel, evil people. You should consider yourself lucky that I am letting you stay with me, got that?" Trunks stared blankly.   
  
"She didn't get one of those funny looks again did she???" Vegeta sighed, forgetting that sighing was too dull for the Prince of Saiya-jins. He motioned for the boy to follow. "Boy, mom sure is weird... But then again, so are you, dad! Ha ha ha!"   
  
The Prince stopped dead in his tracks. He really hated it when his naive little son could make better insults, and so on, so forth. "Come on, we've gotta get a good lawyer, or else Buruma-san won't have to pay child support. I hear that Yamcha is a really good lawyer... You and I will find the best out there, right, Trunks? Trunks???" Vegeta looked around, finding him nowhere. "I GIVE UP AHHH!!!!!!!"   
  
"Troubles with your wife? Hee hee, I got none with mine!" Krillin winked at the Saiya-jin sitting across from his desk. Krillin took up a job as a lawyer after he found out that Yamcha was also in the business. Vegeta looked around, and started to examine a really pretty looking paperweight. "Don't touch that!" Krillin snapped. Vegeta meekly put the paperweight back.   
  
"Krillin Hurry Up!" He rubbed his jaw...Earlier on the walk to Krillin's office, he got mugged. Somehow, he was beaten up for not having any money. What's with me today anyway?!?!?! Vegeta thought glumly. Could be worse, he thought optimistically. The phone rang. Krillin picked it up.  
  
"H'yello! Oh, this is Krillin speaking, how may I help you? Mmmhmm...Uh huh...Yep...Got it. Riiight. O-kaay. Thanks. Uh huh! Bu-bye!" He replaced the receiver and stared at Vegeta for a long time. After awhile, Vegeta stared back, trying not to blink. Krillin smirked, knowing he would win anyway. Finally, the Prince gave up and turned away, shutting his eyes fiercely.   
  
"Soo...drryyy...no moisture...aaahh.." Vegeta says. Krillin snickered. As soon as the moisture returned to Vegeta's eyes, he faced Krillin again. But this time he did not attempt to hold a staring contest. After another while, Vegeta grew impatient. "Well?!"  
  
"Well what?"  
  
"What was the phone call about??"  
  
"Oh that..."  
  
"Well?"  
  
"WELL WHAT?!"   
  
"Tell me what the phone call was about, baka!"  
  
"Ohhh, I see!" Krillin winked again. "That was your wife, Bulma." Vegeta awaited more info, but soon realized the short man needed more prompting.   
  
"What did she want?"  
  
"What did who want?"  
  
"What did Buruma-san want?"  
  
"Uhh...I don't remember! I wasn't really paying attention!"   
  
"Aaaaaagggh!" Vegeta screamed again. "Well, can you help me with the divorce?"  
  
"Nope, 'fraid I can't." Vegeta was in shock.   
  
"Why not?!"  
  
"Just can't. That's all."  
  
"You son of a---" Krillin closed Vegeta's mouth and smiled wrily.   
  
He said, "Careful. This is G rated, remember?" Vegeta growled again and left Krillin's office.   
  
"Daaad! Mom's inside! She wants to talk to you!" Vegeta glared at Trunks. He did not want to talk to anyone at all. He ignored the boy and continued to walk past Capsule Corp. "Dad? Hey, come back! She's not weird anymore! It's okay to go back!"   
  
"Hmph...After the way I've been treated? I'd rather die...Tell Buruma-san that I'm going to live on my own. I'm getting a job! Trunks-chan." Vegeta waved a hand and flew away. Trunks asked,"Where? Umm...to McDonalds?" ^_^   
  
"What do you mean, 'You must use the deep fryer, not your hand'?!!?!" Vegeta cried at the assistant manager who was training the Prince for a job at McDonalds. The young teenager adjusted his wire-framed glasses.   
  
"You cannot fire an energy bolt to cook the fries. It isn't right, Vegeta. People want greasy food. That's what we give them. GREASE with fries on the side." Vegeta stuck his tongue out in disgust. He got very bored and tired of the assistant manager. So he Big Bang-attacked the whole building.   
  
"Yucky food anyway..." Vegeta sighed, once more forgetting his thought of how sighing was dull for a Saiya-jin Prince. This wasn't his day. He started to make the fly back home. Hopefully Bulma wasn't too mad at him. 

Vegeta walked through the door waiting for the worst. Bulma, " Hi there my big hunk of hunny bun prince!" Vegeta, "What happened to you?" Bulma said in a motherish type voice, "Awww…. Did my poor prince cuddle have a bad day? Come here and lets make it all better!" Vegeta, "OK!!!!" Bulma grabs vegeta and head to the bedroom. * Ok the pic just went from G to PG lets end it right here*

Another day approached. Another freaky look would come across his wife's face. And another Trunks and Krillin would bug him insanely. And more would come...It was enough to make one weep.  
  
**************************

That's all folks hope you enjoyed! Make sure to review! Bye for know! 

PS: Whach out for the evil elmo wearing fur coats! We are watching you!

  



End file.
